Have you ever watched a movie and asked yourself, why did I watch that or what was that all about? I know I have and yet other people find it appealing, such is the nature of personal taste. As for me, when it crosses the threshold of eye-stain, brain-pain, won’t watch again, here’s a few criteria.
- Gratuitous violence
- Gratuitous sex
- Rambling plot
- Inane language
- Comedy that tries to be funny (and isn’t)
- Characters which I would want dead myself..
I’ve seen a few films where I just want to get up and leave. Two of them I did, and three I wish I had.
Here’s an example of a film that I chose to walk out on and one that I wish I had. I went with my wife while we were out-of-town and attended a movie called “Grizzly”. I think we made it through the first 30 minutes, maybe less, but it was a lot longer than we cared to watch. Now here’s another movie, which may come as a surprise to some. Let’s see if you can guess the movie title.
A cab driver works the nightshift driving through a decaying major metropolis. He fantasizes about a hard rain to wash the lowlife’s off the streets. A loner who attempts without success to connect with anyone, even other cabby’s. He becomes infatuated with a pretty woman running a local political campaign and after several attempts to date her, succeeds in one night out but she soon loses interest when he takes her to a porn film.
Now dejected and after an encounter with a malevolent fare this pitiable loner turns his attention to physical fitness and arming himself for an imaginary encounter in an iconic moment of all the bad people he sees and wants to liberate the city from. This culminates in a massive display of violence after his new-found attention on a minor working the streets of the city. He acts out in his Don Quixote fixation by “saving” this teen hooker from her pimp when he breaks in and shoots people who block his quest inside a brothel. I only walked just before the credits rolled because I kept hoping this movie could redeem itself. It didn’t in my humble opinion.
The irony I see in a film such as this is in the end, the protagonist is lauded as a hero in rescuing an underage girl from a life of indignity. Audience reviews and critics honor it as well as one of the greatest films of all time. Wow! That’s not going to happen for me.
How about you? Do you have a film which you might cite as a golden turkey?
- Should heroes have a license to kill?
- Taxi Driver (1976 IMDb)
- Grizzly (1976 IMDb)
- Murderer’s and Hero’s are the Same (WordPress Blog)
- Benedict Cumberbatch and the Sign of Four (or is it Three? A little humor)